


Searchin for a rainbow

by DestielIsFuckinReal



Series: Season 14 codas and speculations [6]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Episode: s14e10 Nihilism, Hurt/Comfort, Michael knows, You can't change my mind
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-14 00:01:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17497823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DestielIsFuckinReal/pseuds/DestielIsFuckinReal
Summary: Hello, I rewrote some things from last episode. As always, I hope you enjoy





	Searchin for a rainbow

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, I rewrote some things from last episode. As always, I hope you enjoy

Castiel never had the chance to look at Michael before, because it would be too painful. But now, staring at him from merely few feet apart, he can't take his eyes off of him. Castiel can see how powerful this Michael is, even more powerful than his brother of this world. It's at the same time beautiful and terrifying, this force, this will to destroy everything and everyone. Castiel sees Dean in his features, but can't really see him, his soul dimmed by Michael's grace. 

«So tell me» Michael breaks the silence, «Why do you love this world enough to risk your own life?»

Castiel doesn't dare to reply with the truth. He's about to come up with a comeback, when Michael speaks again, understanding dawning on his face, «Oh, I see. It's not this world, it's your family, Sam, Jack, but...» he clicks his tongue, smiles, «It's especially Dean, isn't it?» Castiel doesn't say a word and Michael keeps going, leaning on his knees as much as his restrains allow him, «I can feel it, Castiel, I can feel everything he felt, see all his memories. He used to call to you, you know? Pray to you, to help him while he drowned in his mind, while _I made him drown_ » he sits back again, «If you only knew, Castiel...»

«That's enough!» Castiel explodes, Michael's smile making him more frustrated by the second, «We're gonna save Dean and defeat you, may it be the last thing I do»

«Cas?» Sam's voice comes from the other room.

«Go» Michael says, making a shoo movement with his hand, «your human is calling for you, little pet»

Castiel glares at Michael one last time before going to Sam to hear his plan.

\---

The plan consists in Sam entering Dean's mind using the Men of Letters' machinery and Cas hitching a ride. So far so good, until they find themselves in pitch black that looks too much like the Empty for Castiel's likings. Amongst all the trauma Dean experienced, they find a memory that never happened, of Dean owning a bar. Castiel follows it, leading both of them in a little bar, _Searchin for a rainbow_ by The Marshall Tucker Band playing on the jukebox while rain pours outside. Behind the bar, Dean and Pamela are talking animately, as if the psychic is an old friend, and in this particular fantasy, she probably is.

«Sam, Cas,» Dean smiles, walking around to stand in front of them, «how was Wichita?» he asks, walking closer to Castiel, leaning in for a... kiss? Castiel leans back at the last moment. He can't do this, not here and not now at least, not when Dean can't tell apart reality from fantasy.

Dean frowns, looking offended, «What's going on?»

«Dean, this isn't real» Castiel says.

«This isn't real?» Dean says, crossing his arms as if to protect himself, «What do you mean, are you breaking up with me or something?»

«Dean» this time, it's Sam who speaks, «this is just a fantasy, Michael is-»

Then the scene changes suddenly and Dean and Pamela are killing two rough vampires, blood splashing on both Sam and Castiel.

«Sam, Cas» Dean says again like he's only seen them for the first time, «how was Wichita?»

«You guys got real messy on that ghoul hunt, uh?» Pamela chuckles.

«No, we didn't get messy on a hunt» Castiel explains, «We got messy just now, in this bar, in a vampire fight»

Dean looks confused now.

«Maybe we should rethink the beers» Pamela wonders.

«Ok» Sam says, «Dean, listen to me. I think you're stuck in a loop in your mind, Michael is possessing you! You have to remember that»

«Michael?» Dean asks, confused, «Michael is in the Cage. Is this some kind of a joke?»

«No Dean, this is not a joke»

«Ok, ok» Pamela steps in, «if we're all in Dean's head, he should be able to control things, like a lucid dream»

«Yeah, maybe...» Sam says, not knowing where she's going.

Pamela turns to Dean, «Give me a shot... With your brain»

Castiel rolls his eyes at the exchange, while Sam explains once again that this whole thing, the bar and Pamela aren't real, that they're just the result of Michael playing with Dean's head. Then, as if something just came to his mind, Sam whispers, «Poughkeepsie»

«What'd you say?»

«Poughkeepsie» Sam repeats, louder, and it's like something breaks because Dean is finally remembering. That's when Michael decides to appear.

«Well, this is fun» he says.

«Get out of my head» Dean commands, but Michael doesn't listen to him, instead he starts spitting venom on him and his feelings for Sam and Castiel and it goes downhill from there, Michael having the best of it in the fight that follows, until Dean traps him in the bar's fridge, locking the door.

«It will hold, my mind, my rules» he says, «I'm the Cage» 

\---

They return to the bunker, Jack explains that he and the hunters stopped the monsters for good.

The bunker is silent now, everyone sleeping in their respective rooms. Castiel likes it this way, in the middle of the night, when everything settles down and the only sounds are the humming of the lights and the wind outside, it's relaxing, and it makes him think. Castiel wanders the halls, out of habit more than anything, when he stops in front of Dean's door. It's ajar, the light of the bedside table on. Castiel knocks softly and peers inside, finding Dean sitting on the bed, his back to the headboard, knees up and face in his hands, Castiel feels distress in his soul and enters the room without waiting for an invitation. He sits at the end of the bed, touching Dean's ankle, who winces, but relaxes a fraction nonethless.

They stay like this for some moments, before Dean speaks, not looking up, «He won't stop» a groan, «He won't stop screaming and banging on the door»

«I'm sorry» Castiel says, but he knows it won't ease Dean's pain. He stands up, sitting next to Dean, taking him in his arms. Dean goes willingly, burying his face in Castiel's chest, giving Castiel the liberty to run his fingers through his hair.

«Please, make him stop» Dean pleads, voice broken. Castiel wants to tear up.

«I don't know how»

«Do something!» Dean implores, gripping Castiel's trenchcoat with his hand.

«I can make you sleep»

It wasn't a question, but Dean nods anyway. Castiel raises two fingers, but before they touch Dean's forehead, the hunter raises his eyes, «Please, don't leave me alone»

As if Castiel would ever. «I won't» he says.

«And, Cas?» Dean says, touching his wrist, «What I almost did in my head, when you and Sam first came into the bar...»

Castiel knows what he's talking about, the almost kiss, the one Castiel rejected then. He says, «We'll talk about it when Michael won't be a problem anymore» something changes in Dean's eyes for a moment and Castiel smiles, hoping it will reassure him, «I'm not saying I didn't want it»

«Cas, I...» he sighs, closes his eyes, opens them again, «We'll talk about it once Michael is dead»

Castiel nods, touches Dean's forehead with his lips before his fingers, it's not much, but at least it's something to let Dean know he's not alone in this. He holds Dean the whole night, trying to keep Michael at bay.


End file.
